Poulet Battu

Otherwise known as Beaten Chicken. This is really Chicken French, but since the creator of this dish described the first step as

"Well I beat the heck out of the chicken..."

I decided that beating the chicken was central to the success of the dish.

2 Full chicken breasts, each cut in half, uh making 4 chicken breasts.
1 Cup of Bisquick, seasoned with salt/pepper and/or some Cajun seasoning
2 eggs
1/4 cup lemon juice
1/4 cup sweet vermouth
2 tbl capers

Beat the heck out of each chicken breast, using saran wrap and a rolling pin. Hmm, wrap each chicken breast in saran wrap or a plastic bag, then using something heavy like rolling pin or another pan, flatten the chicken breast. Beat until the breast is half as thick as original. This breast reduction changes the texture to something with a better mouth feel.


Dredge breast in seasoned bisquick.

whisk 2 eggs with 2 tbl lemon juice.

Dredge breast in egg mixture.

Add to a pan that is not too hot.
Brown both sides, but don't over cook

Add lemon juice sweet vermouth
Capers or whatever
350 for 20 minutes covered

Podium Girl Pancakes

I am sure you know the type, that over achiever, that person who makes Mary Poppins (practically perfect in any way) look like a slacker. Look, us mere mortals must take every opportunity we get to make sure we recognize every time "those" other people make the slightest of errors. Ok, keep reading you fellow slackers, cause here is a tale that will make you grin. Various people (including myselft) have said there are finite albeit large set of potential edible things in this world. Even further reduce that to just include the set of edible pancake recipes, and all of sudden you realize while still large, the number of pancake recipes is finite, and almost small. You probably think this is a vendetta story, you are right, so lets get to the heart of the matter.

I figure by eliminating one of the many pancake recipes possible, I have made this world a better place. Let me save you the time from duplicating this culinary tragedy. A women I know (lets call her Rose) offered to make me pancakes the other day. Well Rose (one of those over achiever types) figured she could whip up an incredible stack of pancakes, from an untried recipe on the side of a bisquick box. I am fairly risk adverse, but love when others try and especially when they fail.

First this recipe is only published on the back side of the bisquick box, and it says something like light and fluffy, and it contains lemon juice. (Note to self: avoid any pancake recipe that contains lemon juice). I assume the lemon juice was used to react with the baking soda.

Anyway Rose makes the batter and pours a glob into a cold pan. Apparently Rose forgot or was not instructed to oil the pan as well. Rose then heats the pan to say 95 degrees. After 10 minutes the pancakes begin to evolve into higher life forms, but nothing resembles the picture on the side of the box. Rose as a last resort asks for help (Over Achievers rarely believe someone else may know something they don't and hate asking for help). Its clear we are dealing with the Perfect Storm of pancakes. Mix too low of heat, no oil, and a really bad pancake recipe and well This is what you get.

Thanks Rose, I think I will use the traditional pancake recipe instead of the "light and fluffy" variety.

Now it turns out Rose did recover from this kitchen disaster and made a perfectly scrumptious chicken dish which I call Poulet Battu, or beaten chicken in French. Or basically Chicken French in which the secret is "beating" the chicken. That recipe is coming soon. Wait, I never actually saw Rose cook that chicken, but rather it came already made and had to be reheated. Well anyway I recreated (and improved upon) her recipe. Keep reading this blog, remember Rome was not built in a day Rose.